Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Choose Mules

So...a mule and an anti-abortion extremist walk in to a bar together.

The bartender approaches the anti-abortion extremist - let's call him Neil Horsley - and asks Neil Horsley what he wants to drink. Neil Horsley orders a Shirley Temple for himself and tells the bartender that if the mule stomps once he'd like a bag of oats but if the mule stomps twice then he's got a hankering for a Clydesdale Budweiser.

But the mule stomps three times.

The bartender asks Neil Horsley what the hell that means. Neil Horsley explains that the mule wants a Morning After pill because Neil Horsley and the mule just had sex.

In Search Of Utopia (via Say Anything & Newshounds) posted a transcript of an interview with Neil Horsley from the Alan Colmes radio show in which the anti-abortion extremist - who achieved infamy for starting a Website that was little more than a hit list for doctors who perform abortions - fesses up that he used to have sex with mules on his farm when he was growing up:

AC: “You had sex with animals?”

NH: “Absolutely. I was a fool. When you grow up on a farm in Georgia, your first girlfriend is a mule.”

AC: “I’m not so sure that that is so.”

NH: “You didn’t grow up on a farm in Georgia, did you?”

AC: “Are you suggesting that everybody who grows up on a farm in Georgia has a mule as a girlfriend?”

NH: It has historically been the case. You people are so far removed from the reality… Welcome to domestic life on the farm…”

In a Google search for more info on Neil Horsley, I stumbled upon a mirror site for the Nuremberg Files which was banned from the Internet. Only, this Website isn't exactly a mirror site. It was created by "a left-wing, atheist, cursing, slightly perverted, sex-loving, smoking, drugs-promoting, pro-abortion, bisexual, free speech advocate" from the Netherlands who warns would-be Clayton Waagners:

"For the people who intend to use this page for foul means, I have this to say. First of all, I have captioned the Nuremberg Files with links to my motivation and a legal analysis; you cannot link to this page without seeing it in the context that I provide you with. Secondly, you can never be sure that I haven't amended the page. Do not trust the names and addresses you find there, and do not use violence against the people listed. You may end up shooting your own affiliates."

They shoot horse fuckers, don't they?


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