Friday, December 19, 2003

Bush To Change Vacation Plans

I.C.Y.D.K.

In case you didn't know, if you type "miserable failure" into a search engine such as Yahoo or href="http://www.google.com">Google, then the first site that comes up is the biography for a certain non-August-working dude. Soon after word of this tron-foolery broke out, copycat dumbos worked it so that sites for Michael Moore and Senator Clinton rounded out the top five. I bring this up, partly, because I recently discovered (innocently and inadvertently...I swear) that my humble site is the number one recommended destination for people that want to know how big Brad Pitt's cocker spaniel is (more-or-less). Sorry to let any curious, wayward Pittster (Michael, too) fans down but I possess no inside khaki information. I thought he was marvelous in the movie "Seven" but I have no way of knowing his measure for measure (again, more-or-less).

BUSH TO CHANGE VACATION PLANS

Ultra-magnification of a document briefly shown in last Sunday's 60 Minutes reveals astonishing revelations (not, necessarily, related to the New Testament). While former Treasury Secretary Paul F. O'Neill gave his interview the cameras accidentally picked up a glimpse of a super-secret, F.N.C.E.O. (for neo-con eyes only) bulletin that may or may not be intended for a future threat matrix (reality or show). When viewed underwater with x-ray specs and 3-D glasses, the document obscurely details Resident Bush's plans for 2005, should he prevail, once again, in stopping the votes from being accurately counted in the 2004 election.

Because of recent events (and manipulations) Dubya will no longer be vacationing for the entire month of August. 43 with an asterisk intends to work (mostly) the whole month long. That way, Bushie will be able to spend the remaining eleven months of the year preparing for his space travels while Rumsfeld, Cheney and Wolfie run tings.


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